


Saving a Soul

by Uniasus



Series: Saving and Healing a Soul [1]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Crucifixion, Friendship, Gen, Implied/Referenced Torture, Kanda can be a concerned friend when he wants to be, Rape/Non-con Elements, Violence, actually yeah, and exploded ankle bones, at the very least there is a lot of blood, cuz I think that happens in every longish DGM fic I write, lots and lots of talk about souls, that I don't think is graphic but I'm probably desensitized, this does sound graphic looking at all my tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-23
Updated: 2015-02-23
Packaged: 2018-03-14 18:03:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3420344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Uniasus/pseuds/Uniasus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There has to be something wrong; Allen hasn't had breakfast or lunch, Johnny saw him in the arms of Crow agents, and Link knows nothing about that. To make matters worse, a unknown Noah shows up in HQ and Kanda can't help but think it's the 14th.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Saving a Soul

**Author's Note:**

> Oh man, cross posting this from ff.net where this first saw daylight July, 2011. That said, this takes place, timeliney after the Ark storyline and they're doing random missions. Link has been placed to watch over Allen, and they already did the mission at the orphanage. 
> 
> While not really inspired by Kithren's [Broken White](https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5890505/1/Broken-White) fic, I did borrow some elements from it.
> 
> Check out the underlined portions for notes!

A Walker-less Link wasn’t as uncommon as one would have thought within Headquarters. Granted, such situations were usually quickly remedied as Link seemed to know exactly where Allen had gone. It usually was the cafeteria. 

No surprise there.

But what was surprising was Link asking if anyone had seen Walker. In the cafeteria. The blonde Central agent looked harried, and a bit confused, when he sat at the table Kanda was sharing with Lavi and Lenalee. 

“So you haven’t seen Walker at all?”

“No, but I’m impressed he’s given you the slip for so long!” Lavi’s face crinkled into a smile. Lenalee gave him a not so gentle prod with her elbow. 

“Sorry we can’t help, Link,” she said. 

The Central agent narrowed his eyes at her. “You sure? Because I ran into Johnny a little under an hour ago and asked him if he knew were Walker was. He answered ‘like you don’t know’. I figured the science department needed him for something.”

“Did you ask my brother yet?”

Link shook his head, “You’re brother is…let’s just say I’m not in his good graces.”

Kanda snorted, of course the inspector wasn’t, but the blonde ignored him and continued. “Would you mind asking him for me, Lenalee?”

“Sure, once I’m done with lunch.”

Link nodded, then stood. “Please inform me if you learn of his whereabouts. It doesn’t help his image, being unsupervised and missing for hours.”

“Hours?” Kanda asked, looking up from his soba bento. Walker had developed the habit to hide, for a lack of better word, but he usually wasn’t gone for more than an hour. He kept his aloof look up, not wanting to seemed worried.

Lavi was frowning, and Link nodded. “I haven’t seen him since before breakfast.”

“We’ll look around Link, and let you know.” Lenalee offered. 

“Thank you. “ Link turned around and left. 

Lavi hummed. “I knew Allen was annoyed with being followed, but even he’s gotta know it’s in his best interests right now to not hide out somewhere. “

“Well, let’s go look for him.” Lenalee stood, gathering up her plates, and Lavi and Kanda joined her in returning their dishes to one of Jerry’s assistants. Jerry himself was cooking up mounds of food, more than what Walker usually ate even, and when he noticed them waved a wooden spoon in their direction. 

“Do you guys know when Allen will be down? He didn’t eat breakfast and I’m sure he’s starving by now.”

“He hasn’t eaten?” Lavi repeated, blinking owlishly. 

“Che,” Kanda responded and started walking towards the door. “We’ll probably find him half dead in a corner.”

“So morbid, Yu!” Lavi said, skipping to catch up. 

“Well, let’s just find my brother and ask him if he knows where Allen is.”

But they didn’t find Komui in his office, just a haggard staff also looking for him which made Kanda think he was skipping out on work again. 

“If you find him,” Reever called from around a pile of paper, “tell him he needs to get back to work!”

“Of course!” Lenalee gave a small wave and made to walk out of the room, Lavi on her heels. Kanda stayed for a bit longer. “Where’s Johnny?”

“Organizing storage room 67, why?”

Kanda didn’t answer, just walked out with his hair trailing and leaving his fellow exorcists to follow. He did as he pleased, that’s way. 

“Where are we going, Yu?” Lavi asked, bouncing next to him. 

Kanda’s fist shot out and the redhead ducked. The rabbit was so fucking annoying!

“Whoa!”

“We’re going to see Johnny, obviously.” Lenalee supplied, swinging her hands behind her as she walked. “I forgot Link said he knew something. That’s just like you Kanda, remembering the details.”

The Japanese man just forced air between his teeth in a typical manner. 

Lavi snuck an arm around Kanda’s neck. “So, you like Allen then, do you?”

Kanda gave him a glare.

“I mean, you don’t hate him.”

“He’s a beansprout, not worth my time.”

“The~n, why are you here?”

Kanda shook off the younger’s man hand and stopped. “Good point. I’m leaving.” He turned around and made his way down the hallway towards the stairs they had just walked down. To be honest, he didn’t know why he was helping them find Walker. There were plenty of other things he could be doing. 

Lenalee turned to follow him. “Kanda! Wait – oh, hi Johnny.”

The glasses wearing science aid rounded the corner, a box in his hands. 

“Lenalee, Lavi,” Johnny looked between them to see Kanda approaching from behind, “Kanda too. What are you doing down here?”

“Looking for you actually,” Lenalee said. “We’re looking for Allen, but haven’t seen him all day.”

Johnny frowned. “I saw him with people from Central this morning, they were taking him down to the lower levels. Allen said they just wanted talk to him again, so they should be done by now. I bet Allen’s in the cafeteria eating.”

The three exorcists shared a look. They knew Allen wasn’t eating, and the fact that Link didn’t know anything about this was troublesome. Someone was acting behind his back, or Leverrier’s back, and who ever was doing that wasn’t a friend. 

“You couldn’t happen to be more specific about where they took Allen, could you?” Lavi asked, hand fiddling with the strap on his hammer. 

“They took the North staircase down, hey! Wait! Where are you going?!” he shouted as the three exorcists took off towards the stairs.

“We’re going to check on Allen! Find my brother and tell him what you told us,” Lenalee turned to give Johnny a wave, and then caught up with the two males. 

They made it down two flights of stairs before the warning siren went off. It echoed through the stone corridors and caused the three of them to stop. “Intruder in HQ, intruder in HQ. He was last seen on level B5, all exorcists are to engage.”

Kanda swore, and then continued down three flights of stairs before streaking down the corridor, Mugen unsheathed and held to his side. Lenalee and Lavi followed, their shadows flickering on the wall. 

Just like the old tower HQ, this new chapel one had levels underground. Levels mostly just there for storage, but there were a few dungeons and a couple rooms to be used in the case of lock down, or another outbreak of Komuvitan- D. The corridor they were running down was lit by torches in old-fashioned wall mounts. It was a weak, dim light that kept flickering, other wise they would have noticed something was amiss earlier. 

There was a finder sitting on the edge of the light, and something about the scene set Kanda on edge. He held out an arm to stop Lavi and Lenalee. They paused and let him approach alone. 

“Kanda?” Lenalee asked, voice hesitant. 

“He’s dead. And so is the other finder next to him.”

Lenalee gasped and was about to say something when the intercom turned once again. “We have confirmation that the intruder is an unknown Noah. I repeat, the intruder is a Noah.”

Lavi swore. 

“It’s not Allen,” Lenalee muttered to herself, “It’s not Allen.”

“We don’t know that!” Kanda snapped at her. She needed to pull herself together.

“It’s not!” she cried and with her Dark Boots rushed past Kanda and Lavi before they could stop her. 

“Che.” Kanda took off after her, Lavi on his heels. 

Was it Walker? Now looking for it, there was blood on the walls, bodies and body parts scattered in the dark shadows. And at the stairs, the trail went up. Wouldn’t a Noah go down, towards Helvaska and the innocence? Why go up unless to escape? 

An image flashed in Kanda’s mind, of Inquisition type methods being used on Walker, of the injuries being too much and the Noah talking control, and no one there knowing how, or wanting to, to call back the exorcist.

He almost ran into Lenalee on the stairs two flights up, but managed to stop in time and get out of the way to allow Lavi to crash into her instead. There was the sound of fighting up ahead: an unfamiliar voice cursing the Black Order and promising retribution for the pain it had caused, what sounded like mini explosions, and the death gurgles of finders. 

“I don’t want to know if that’s, was, Allen,” Lenalee whispered, tears in the corner of her eyes. 

“You could just stay here,” Kanda suggested, purposely not looking at the teary girl, “But he asked for us to kill him if this happened.”

“He said it wouldn’t, that he’d stop the 14th.”

“Well, obviously he couldn’t.”

Lavi placed a hand on her shoulder. “Stay here, Lenalee.”

She shook her head. “I, I,” she mouthed something neither of them heard, and she lowered her eyes to the ground. “Together?” she asked. 

They both nodded and all three of them raced up the stairs. 

The Noah wasn’t far down the corridor from the stairs, back to them as he used a dagger to slice the throat of a finder. Black hair that reached to his chin, ashen skin, wavy hair. The clothes were unfamiliar, but that didn’t matter. 

Lenalee jumped, Kanda brought his sword out to hip height, and Lavi extended his hammer in a bid for the Noah’s ankles. 

The Noah turned, gold eyes flashing. He jumped, avoiding Lavi’s attack and throwing off Lenalee’s. Kanda shifted his grip, changed his stroke, and sliced Mugen upwards only to be blocked by the bloody dagger. 

All four of them froze. 

In the Noah’s arm, cradled with one arm to his chest in a hanging fetal position, was Walker.

A bloody Walker, that was for sure. His hair was matted with red, it looked like he was missing an ear, and his chest was slashed. There were red droplets dripping onto the floor, and the Noah’s shirt was steadily turning red despite that lack of wounds on his body. Which meant it all came from Walker. 

The Noah relaxed his stance, but didn’t lower his dagger. “You came to save him too, did you? Well, he’s mine now.”

“Allen, Allen!” Lenalee screamed. “Wake up!”

“Shh, he’s hiding.” The Noah said, bringing the dagger to his lips in lue of a finger.

“Hand him over,” Kanda demanded, stepping forward. 

The Noah’s eyes sparkled. “No, and you can’t make me. In fact,” he hummed a tune and the white door to the Ark appeared behind him, “I feel like I’ve dished out enough punishment to the Order for what they did to Allen. Today anyway. I might be back tomorrow.”

He wiped his dagger on what remained of Walker’s right sleeve and then sheathed it in his boot. “Until later, exorcists.”

Lavi started calling on his hammer to extend, but Mugen didn’t need such an incantation. Kanda ran straight for the door on swift feet, making it through just before it closed behind the Noah. 

Kanda found himself on Walker’s Ark, with its white buildings and cobblestone streets. The 14th, for what other Noah could command the Ark but him, was already a block ahead of him. Knowing the only advantage he had was surprise, Kanda slowly crept after him. 

And was more than mildly surprised in return to notice the 14th stripping Allen of his clothes while he was walking. Belt, tie, shirt (or what was left it), fell to the ground and as Kanda got closer he found the Noah’s speech disturbing. 

“Still hiding, are you? That’s okay, you don’t have to be here for what I have planned. I had wanted to start with a bath, but now, looking at you, my bed seems like a more appropriate place to begin. It’s big, and soft, and I’m looking forward to sharing it with you.”

The Noah stopped and Kanda took a few more steps before hiding in a doorway. The 14th lowered his head and released a soft moan. It was only when he started walking and speaking again that Kanda knew he had kissed Walker. What was it with that boy and Noah? 

“A taste like that, no wonder they wanted you so bad. But you’re mine, have been since you were an infant, and nothing will change that.”

“He’s not yours.” Kanda stepped out of his hiding place, Mugen held in a strike position in front of him. 

The Noah whirled around, Walker still in his grip. “He is,” the ashen man snarled, “he’s mine and that means I can do what I want with him.”

“You can’t control people like that! You can’t do such things without their permission.”

“And you have such permission?” The Noah growled at him.

Kanda sputtered at the thought. “What? No!”

“What control do exorcists have over their lives? Did you come to work for the Black Order by choice?”

Kanda ground his teeth. 

“I won’t let you do what you’re planning to him. Give. Him. Back.”

The 14th narrowed his eyes. “I see what’s going on here. You’re jealous. At some point, my Allen has wiggled into your heart and now you think you can take him away from me. He has been mine since before he was born, since I found his pregnant whore of a mother and implanted my memories into him.”

Kanda shifted his stance, coming up with a variety of moves that wouldn’t risk Walker. 

“I’ll tell you what,” The 14th turned and set Walker against the side of a house. Without his shirt, Kanda could see the marks from what the Central agents had done to him. He could also see the Noah had started to undo the white head’s pants. “If you want him that bad, come and get him. I feel like killing you anyhow.”

He rushed at Kanda, faster than the samurai expected, and but he still brought his sword down in a slash. To his surprise, the 14th didn’t try to avoid the blow, or block it with the dagger Kanda knew was hidden in his boot. Instead, the Noah caught Mugen with his forearm. 

Kanda had a moment to stare in shock before the Noah pulled away. He watched in morbid fascination as the muscles and skin healed before his eyes. The 14th simply brushed his other hand over his arm, bringing attention to the healed wound. There wasn’t even a scar. 

“You can’t win this one, exorcist. I heal fast.”

“I do too.”

Kanda pivoted, aiming for the 14th‘s hip and the hit was successful. But the Noah didn’t care about protecting himself. With Kanda in such a position, the 14th landed two crosses on his face, and then a jab to his right side that cracked a rib. He coughed up blood, and then used his hunched over position to form a roll and get out of the way of the Noah’s next attack. 

When he stood up fully, his rib and split lip were healed. 

“So I see,” the Noah said before attacking again. 

Within a minute, Kanda knew he was losing. There was something off about this Noah, about how he didn’t shy away from the innocence induced sword. The other Noah healed just as quickly, but they still felt pain and took steps to avoid it. This one, the 14th, the Musician, didn’t. He didn’t care how many times Mugen sliced into his flesh, hit bone. He would use Kanda’s attack to draw openings and deal devastating blows. 

Kanda knew what he was doing, figured he should change his strategy, but it was so foreign he didn’t know what he could do to counter it. Skin Bolic he had killed by causing massive wounds, but the 14th here was almost going out of his way to acquire them and it made the Japanese man feel off balance. 

The 14th knocked him over with a coffee grinder and Kanda bit his tongue as the back of his head hit the steps leading to a red doorway. The Noah trapped him, knees on either side of his hips and hands pinning his arms to his side. 

“Get off of me,” Kanda growled, hand still griped around Mugen’s hilt.

The Musician opened his mouth to respond, but a raspy, sleepy voice interrupted him. 

“Kanda?”

Good. Walker was awake. As loath as he was to admit it, Kanda could use a hand. 

The Noah grabbed a flowerpot from near Kanda’s head and slammed it down on his chest with enough force to push him back down after an attempt to get up. 

“I don’t think you’ve seen my Noah ability yet,” he cooed and Kanda watched with foreboding as the flowerpot acquired a neon purple glow reminiscent of Tease. “You see, Dark Matter isn’t the most stable of elements, and when forced to merge with something, well, sooner or later, it explodes.”

Kanda’s mind flashed back to the patterns of destruction back at headquarters, and the sounds he heard floating down the stairs before he had charged up them with Lavi and Lenalee. 

Hastily, the 14th got off him just as the flowerpot exploded.

Kanda had been hit with small bombs before, level twos occasionally developed abilities along those lines, but never had something this size resulted in so much damage and pain. His entire rib cage shattered, fragments entering his lungs, damaging other internal organs, or scattering around him. 

He tried to dull the pain and hurry his healing because from how his head was propped on a step he could see Walker waking up. There was something wrong, the other exorcist looked confused and disorientated. After doing missions together, he knew the white head was usually ready to go once up for survival purposes. Walker moved his head back and forth as if he didn’t recognize where he was and weakly called out again. “Kanda?”

“Walker, move! He’s coming right at you!” Kanda tried to speak, but his lungs couldn’t get the air they needed and he refused to look down at his chest to see how much healing he had left to do. He didn’t want to see a lot of damage, he wanted to see a chest healed enough for him to move, but he knew that was impossible at this moment. All he could do was watch.

The 14th trailed his fingers down the side of Walker’s face, who jerked back. The Noah then grabbed a handful of white hair, forcing Walker’s head back and exposing his neck. Kanda noticed the other exorcist’s eyes sharpen, finally noticing something was wrong, and cursed the beansprout for not noticing anything earlier. What was wrong with him? Had the Central agents drugged him?

“Now, now White,” the Musician sing-songed, “You should still be hiding.” The Noah attached his other hand over Walker’s face, Walker finally activated his innocence, but by then the Musician had started humming and Walker’s arm went back to normal as he slumped over, once again unconscious. 

The 14th looked over his shoulder at Kanda and raised an eyebrow. It was creepy how much he looked like Walker. “Can you even die, exorcist?” he asked. 

Kanda heard a snap and felt something expand in his chest as his lungs healed. But even though he was able to speak now, he didn’t do anything but glare. Half a minute, that’s all he needed and then he could be on his feet again. 

The Noah reached out to stroke Walker’s hair, still watching Kanda. “He wasn’t supposed to wake up so soon, so I had him hide someplace different now. But I should take precautions just in case. I don’t want him escaping after all.” While he spoke, his hand hovered down Walker’s body till it stopped over his left ankle. “Feet aren’t that important, are they?”

The 14th lowered his hand, and Kanda watch in horror as the area underneath took on a similar look to the flowerpot moments earlier. 

“No!” he shouted, rolling up into a crouched position, not that he had any idea how to help. He was too late anyway. As soon as Kanda was upright Walker’s ankle exploded; blood, flesh, bone fragments, and boot leather splattered the wall and the Noah. Walker didn’t even twitch, what had the Musician done to him?

“Now then, you need to die.” The 14th stood up from his crouch over Walker, and Kanda stood too. His skin had healed, but he could tell his insides and most of his ribs needed more time yet. 

“Funny, I was going say the same thing.” Kanda schooled his expression and brought Mugen into a ready position. The Musician ran forward, body low, and Kanda sidestepped to release his first illusion. 

“Underworld Insects!” They burst from Mugen, homing in on the Noah. The ashen man grimaced as strong jaws clamped on his arms and legs, the bites deep and bleeding for the wounds couldn’t heal until the apparitions faded away. It didn’t stop him from moving though, and he swung his arm around so the armored body of a worm slammed into Kanda’s face. 

Kanda took a step back, to have his own weapon used against him! His hackles rose and he moved to attack again. A swift cut to the neck wasn’t something a Noah could recover from quickly. The 14th ducked however and thrust both hands into Kanda’s stomach, his still tender ribs screamed in protest as he found him flying through the air to hit a wall and slide to the floor not far from Walker. 

Quickly, the Noah was there and stepped on his hand, forcing him to release Mugen. The Musician clasped his hand over Kanda’s right one. “ You don’t really need this, do you?”

His hand exploded, but the pain wasn’t as immense from when the flowerpot detonated on his chest. He managed to choke off his scream of pain this time. 

The Noah stood over him, grinning evilly when a high-pitched voice giggled down the street.

“Allen! You’ve come to join us! I’m so-“ Rhode Camelot cut herself off and Kanda turned his head see her eyes widening as she caught sight of Walker. Tyki Mick was behind her, narrowed gaze focused on the 14th. 

A field of candles appeared between the samurai and the Musician, sharpened ends pointing at both of them. Rhode ran to Walker’s side while Tyki moved at a more sedate pace and took care to place himself in a position to defend Rhode and Walker. 

“We came just for kicks,” Tyki said, “Because Rhode wanted to see if she could catch a glimpse of Allen. She’s a real stalker, that one. I didn’t expect this though, or you. Aren’t you supposed to be inside the cheating boy, Musician?”

The 14th shrugged. “Yes, but I’m not. Is that a problem?”

“For you, yes.” Rhode’s voice was icy and Kanda let out a sigh of relief to see the candle ends pointed at him reverse direction. She stood up. 

“You see Neah, you’re the only one who could have done this to Allen, and as I like him that makes me very mad. 35 years ago, you went after us one at a time in the dark, but you never beat me. And as I’m with Joyd there is no way you’ll win. You would be dying here tonight if Millennie didn’t want you alive. But he never said to bring you back unharmed. And I have half a mind to disobey the Earl right now. It wouldn’t make any big changes to our plan.” 

Tease erupted from Tyki’s hand and now that Kanda’s own appendage had regrown its bones it was only moments before the Japanese could grasp his own weapon. 

A flash of fear crossed the 14th’s eyes and then a gate opened on the floor beneath him. He sank into it, and all but a few stragglers of Rhode’s candles chased him through before the door closed. 

Kanda grabbed Mugen with his left hand and stood, pointing his sword at the Noah. “I appreciate it, you chasing him off, but I can’t let you leave here unharmed.”

Tyki snorted, Tease retracting into his palm. “Please boy, like you could take me. You’d have to be a high level critical to do that.”

“I’m the only one that can help Allen at the moment anyway.” Rhode lifted up Walker’s eyelid and peered underneath it. “He’s not here.”

“What are you playing at?” Kanda snapped.

Rhode gave him a look that made him feel like he was five again. Tyki just snorted and went to sit next to Walker’s head.

“Meaning his soul.”

Kanda slowly lowered his innocence, but kept it unsheathed. “The 14th said something about him hiding.”

The female Noah wrinkled her forehead. She mumbled something, but Kanda only caught the word “Neah”.

“Speak up Noah!”

Rhode glared at him. “Allen and Neah used to be the same person. I mean, they used to, and should still be, sharing the same physical body. As such, their minds, where their souls lived, are really close together and probably have some overlap. Because of that, Neah can enter Allen’s mind and attack his soul. That’s what he did now, hiding him somewhere, maybe in Neah’s own mind. I need to find him.”

“Not without me, you’re not.” Kanda flexed his healed hand. “I don’t trust you by yourself.”

“Wise,” Tyki said, taking the first drag on a cigarette. “But you don’t have worry about it. The Earl wanted Allen because he was the 14th, now that they’re two different people,” he shrugged, “He’s probably still interested in the boy, but we’ll get to that later. We both like him and won’t harm him unless ordered.” 

Kanda heard the words, but ignored them. “Take me with you,” he repeated to Rhode. 

She looked at him through half lidded eyes. “Coming with me means leaving your body, and Allen’s, in Tyki’s care.”

“Che.”

He paused. He wasn’t that worried about his own body, due to his healing skills and suspicion that Tyki was just over playing his power. Walker was a different case though, and the other exorcist was already seriously injured from what ever had happened to him at the Order. Not to mention his blown off foot. Which was still bleeding. And what was the point of saving Walker’s soul if there wasn’t a body for it to return to?

But that went both ways, what if the body survived but Rhode destroyed Walker’s soul?

Kanda glanced at Tyki. The man was simply lounging, blowing smoke towards the ceiling. Neither he nor Rhode had made any move to hurt Walker.

He walked till he towered over Rhode, who was sitting on the ground and stroking Walker’s hair. “Take me with you.”

Rhode grinned, the maliciousness in her smile making him think he chose wrongly, and she jumped up at him with her arms aiming for his neck. He made to bring Mugen up, but wasn’t quick enough and the world went black. 

Well, not completely. There was a moon, white and cratered. No stars though. 

There was a kick to his side, and Kanda turned his head to see Rhode pull back her Mary Jane for another blow. “What?” he growled. 

“Get up, we gotta find Allen.”

Kanda pushed himself up and found that he had been lying on a slanted stone slab. There were others around him, scattered as if someone had just dropped them from a high height. But it was a small spattering, the horizon closer than normal and a solid black. The ground was similar, his feet hit it before he expected and wispy tendrils swirled around his ankles, but it was still solid beneath his feet.

“Where to?” he asked, painfully aware of his lack of information. For comfort he reached for Mugen, but found the sword gone. 

“It’s just you here, no innocence. It doesn’t have a soul like we do. Come on, this way.” Rhode trotted off towards the left. “I can feel a connection in this direction.”

Kanda followed, left hand clutched next to his hip where Mugen usually lay. When his arm started cramping, he relaxed it. 

Out of nowhere a full city plaza materialized around them. They were standing on snow covered steps, looking towards empty streets. There might have been a figure of a clown, faint and see through, but Kanda dismissed it. Rhode was looking at the step below them. There were markings in the snow, lines with dots attached and a stick lying next to them. 

“We’re closer.” She jumped the marked step, and Kanda found himself also avoiding the markings, not wanting to mess them up for some reason he couldn’t understand. 

A few steps past the plaza the blackness came back, but this time there were shapes in it. They looked like trees, dead things with gnarled branches reaching for the dark sky. Or were the trees darker? It was hard to tell and Kanda was surprised he could see them at all. 

He was too busy glaring at the trees to notice Rhode had stopped until she reached out to grasp his wrist. 

There was a low stonewall in front of them, behind which was a lake. Kanda looked at Rhode to ask if Walker was nearby and noticed the troubled look on her face. 

“Something I should know?”

“I…there’s two connections. Allen’s mind is connected to two others. Neah’s and someone else’s. “

“Is that bad?”

“Depends on the who the other person is, but it is unusual.” She let go of his hand and walked to the edge of the lake. Kanda followed and peered into it as well.

The reflection wasn’t the dark trees he could barely see, but was similar to the section they had woken up in, focused on a ruined pillar wall. The moon was a different color, black, while the sky was a bright white. 

“A mind mirror,” Rhode whispered. “We can see into the other mind, but can’t cross into it. Well, I can, but Allen couldn’t. Or who’s mind that is. What’s curious is that the lake is also the connection to Neah. We just have to jump through.”

“Can’t you just use your door?”

“That would get us directly to Neah’s mind and we would skip the path between them, which is where I think Allen is.”

Kanda looked hesitantly at the water. It all seemed too easy and not at the same time. Just jump in? There might be trouble crossing minds, maybe the 14th was waiting for them on the other side. Maybe Walker wasn’t even there.

“Are you sure we’ll find Walker if we jump?’

“No. But knowing Neah, he would have hid him here.”

“Ladies first.”

“And I thought only Allen was a gentleman.” She walked into the water and Kanda followed. When the water reached her mid chest she paused. “Ready? Just go underwater and think down.” 

Kanda raised an eyebrow, but when she disappeared under the surface and didn’t pop up again he let out a ‘che’ and followed. 

He felt the water for a moment, cold silk on his skin, and then it was gone. All there was, was darkness. There was no sense of gravity, though his feet certainly were on something. He felt a moment of panic; Rhode had left him, trapped him here, and was on her way to Walker to destroy him. He reached for the missing Mugen again. 

There was the sound of footsteps and he whirled around to see Rhode walking toward him, surrounded by three lit candles. 

“There you are,” she said, coming to a stop next to him. 

He let some of the tension out of his frame, discretely so as to not let the Noah know just exactly how worried he had been. 

“This way,” she walked past him and he followed half a step behind. He didn’t know how she knew where she was going, but he didn’t have a better plan. 

Eventually Kanda became aware of another light source up ahead. Or rather, not really a light source but a lightening of the black that surrounded them. As they drew nearer, they noticed that there was figure it was illumining in harsh, dramatic lighting. 

When they got closer, they both stopped in shock. It was Walker, and if Kanda had thought the white haired exorcist was seriously injured on the Ark the only way to describe him now would be dead. He was crucified on an iron cross feet five feet off the ground. Instead of the traditional nails in his hand and feet there were swords, two in each appendage with a sinister shine. Holding him to the cross was what looked chains, but judging by the trail of blood making its way down Walker’s bare chest they were spiked, covered in metal points that bit into flesh. 

Those were superficial wounds however compared to the large gashes on his legs and sides. Over the center of his chest looked to be a large burn, with something like a mask protruding out of it. Kanda thought it might belong to Crown Clown, but Rhode had said innocence couldn’t be here and the mask wasn’t quite the same shape. 

“My God,” Rhode whispered and then broke into a run towards Walker. “Allen! Allen!” she screamed, but Walker didn’t lift up his head or open his eyes. 

She stopped two feet from Walker, but Kanda didn’t. Instead he ran straight into something solid but invisible just in front of him and crashed backwards on his ass. 

Rhode slowly walked up next to him and put her hand on the solid wall. “An isolation barrier.” The Noah swelled with anger. “Is Neah trying to kill him?! And you!” She turned on him, fist clenched. “How could you leave Allen like this?!”

Kanda turned to face her, smarting at the accusation. “This is my first fucking time here! Plus, didn’t the 14th just all do that?” he waved his towards Walker. “I have no control over him.”

“A lot of these wounds are old, Allen’s been up on that cross for awhile, though I don’t think it was always here. It’s just one set of swords and the barrier that are new. Why haven’t you been helping him? Isn’t he your friend?”

“I wouldn’t call the beansprout and I friends.” A hundred candles appeared and stabbed him, all too fast for him to react. Kanda heaved over in pain, dropping to one knee. Rhode came up behind him and forced his head up to look at Walker. 

“If you haven’t helped him in the past, there’s no reason why you’ll help him now. And that means there’s no reason for you to be here,” she whispered into his ear right before she brought a knife across Kanda’s throat. 

He woke up back on the Ark, upright and with a hand feeling along his neck. 

“Find him?” Tyki asked. Judging by the butts around him, he was on his third cigarette. 

“Yeah, but he’s in pretty bad shape and we can’t get to him.” Kanda crossed his arms. “And then Rhode said something about me not helping him and killed me, or I guess threw me out of Walker’s mind?”

“How bad?”

“What?”

“Allen, how bad did he look?”

Kanda leaned forward to look around the Noah and get a look at Walker. Tyki had, surprisingly, cleaned and dressed the exorcist’s wounds, though where he got the bandages from was a mystery. 

“Che. Worse than he did before Rhode and I left.”

“And you haven’t helped him at all?” Tyki glared at him.

“How was I supposed to know he was in that bad of shape?”

Tyki’s gaze softened just a little bit, picking up a questioning edge. “The Black Order is a religious organization, and you’re telling me you don’t know a thing about souls?”

“Che.” Kanda didn’t bother giving a real answer, but Tyki seemed to understand. 

“I find that hard to believe.” Rhode appeared from behind a door, a platter of fruit between her hands.

“Why are you here? Shouldn’t you be helping Walker?”

“Like you care.”

“She can be in two worlds at once,” Tyki offered, selecting an apple. 

Rhode collapsed into Tyki’s opposite side, the one near Allen, after having placed the tray on her uncle’s lap. “Neah put up a barrier and I can’t break it.” She turned her head to bury it in Tyki’s chest so her next words were muffled. “He did it with magic. I think there is a timer, but I don’t know when it ends. And I can’t separate Allen’s mind from Neah’s until the barrier comes down and I can move him.”

Kanda was content to just get up and walk away at this point, but if he came back without Walker Lavi would try to kill him in his sleep. And Lenalee would cry. He needed to know what was going on. “What about souls do I need to know?”

Rhode emerged from hiding her face to glare at him. “Even if you don’t know anything, that doesn’t mean you still couldn’t have helped him.”

Tyki placed a calming arm around her shoulders and then turned to Kanda. “You know the basics of life right? Food, water, shelter. Well for humans and several other animals we need to be social too. Even if it’s just with one person once a month, we need human contact.

“Well, souls only need the later, being immaterial and all that. But it’s a double-edged sword. Whenever someone hurts you, they leave, betray your trust, lie to you, your soul is wounded. And the wounds can be picked at, widened by either the person who made them or someone else, something I’m betting the Musician did a lot of. 

“Our bodies heal by themselves, and souls do too but it’s a process that takes years and sometimes wounds never heal completely. That’s where the other side of social contact comes into play. Friends, mentors, and all sort of other positive interaction with others helps heal wounds and acts as armor against such things in the future. 

“For example, I’m sure being with Cross healed some of the wounds Allen developed when Mana died.

“But if he’s behind a barrier, no one can help him right now.”

Kanda “che”d and turned his head away from the Noah. 

“Friends are supposed to help each other,” Rhode spoke up and Kanda could feel her dagger glare on the back of his head. “Talk to each other, soothe fears, help with confidence. None of Allen’s wounds are in the process of healing, he’s been like he is for a while and not a single one of you have helped him! You were right, you aren’t his friend. We should just take him back to Millennie with us.”

Kanda snapped his head around. “No.” he said between clenched teeth.

“See Rhode?” Tyki said to the female Noah, “Told you he was Allen’s friend. He just doesn’t like to admit it.”

Kanda pushed up from the ground and moved across the street to be as far as way from the two Noah as possible and yet still keep an eye on Walker, but it meant he now had to look at Walker’s injured body or either of the Noahs head on. Tyki and Rhode were both giving him fox grins. 

“I think that’s a good idea Rhode. The Earl can undo that barrier, and I’m sure he’ll love to have a Player on our side.” Tyki narrowed his eyes at Kanda. “And it looks like the Order isn’t taking care of his soul as well as we would.”

“I came after him and fought the 14th, didn’t I?” Kanda yelled across to them. 

Tyki threw his head back and laughed, while Rhode just gave him a calculating look. She still wasn’t happy with him, and wasn’t allowing him to use ignorance as an excuse. 

“That you did, that you did.” Tyki stood up, dislodging Rhode and went to pick up Walker. The small Noah hopped up too and pushed a bloody lock of hair out of Walker’s face. She pouted as Tyki crossed the street, but didn’t follow. 

The Noah of Pleasure with the power of Choice didn’t give Kanda an option; he just dropped Walker into his arms, giving the Japanese just enough time to catch the younger boy. Kanda threw the unconscious exorcist in the air a little bit to get a better grip. 

“You’ve been here for longer than you probably think you have been.” Tyki said, “And I’m sure others at the Order are worried too. You guys might not be good friends, but I know Allen thinks highly of you all. Knowing what you know now, you guys better help him. If not, we’ll take him by force if need be.”

“We have more in common that you might think,” Rhode spoke up from across the street. “After all, I knew Mana.”

“What if he doesn’t let us help? All he does is smile, the damn bastard.”

“Then call him out. You already know it’s false by the sound of it. Take the next step.” Tyki stepped back to stand next to Rhode again. 

“The door behind you will take you to the hallway with the open portals to all the branches. You can get back from there.” Rhode said. 

Kanda made to turn, but faced the two Noah again instead. “Why do you care about him so much?”

“Why do you?” Tyki asked back.

Kanda opened his mouth to answer, but found he couldn’t think of anything to say. He cared for Walker because, well, because Walker was Walker. And there were times when the boy needed help and Kanda simply found himself feeling almost compelled to give it. Not that he did, he left that to Lenalee and Lavi, but maybe that should change. Walker had wiggled under his skin and it was only right Kanda return the favor. 

“Che,” he said and walked through the door behind him and was back in HQ five minutes later.

* * *

Kanda hadn’t expected to see Rhode or Tyki again until they had to meet on the battlefield, so to see Rhode’s door materialize in his bedroom that night was a surprise. 

“What do you want?”

“The barrier just fell. Tyki’s helping me, but we could use help.”

“Okay.” He expected Rhode to jump him again, but instead the room seemed to be swallowed up by a darkness that appeared behind the Noah. There was a moment of blackness and then Kanda found himself in Walker’s mind again, standing in front of the cross Walker was crucified on. 

Tyki was sitting on the right branch of the cross, feet swinging back and forth. The four swords that had pinned Walker’s feet were lying on the ground, as was the spiked chain and mask that had been embedded in Walker’s chest. Kanda could now see it was a sad clown mask. 

“This is going to be tricky,” Tyki explained as he stood up and brushed his pants off. “I’m the only one who can get up here, but if I take out these swords and leave Allen hanging by his other hand things won’t be pretty. So I’m going to wrap this rope around his arms to hold him in place while I work, have Rhode hold the end, and then when I remove the last sword she’s going to let go of the rope and you’re going to catch him, okay?”

Kanda nodded and moved to stand next to the cross. He put a hand on in and quickly removed it. The metal was burning cold and he didn’t want to think about the state of Walker’s back. 

“Here we go~,” Tyki sang and Kanda look up at to watch him wrap the rope around Walker’s arms and then pull out the first sword from Walker’s left hand. It had to be a hand of flesh, no matter how much it looked like Walker’s inactivated innocence because Rhode had said innocence didn’t travel here. In light of that, Kanda was surprised at how little blood sprayed from the wound. But again, as Rhode had said, the wounds were old. They were probably half scabbed over. 

Kanda did a mental double take as he realized he was actually taking the female Noah at her word. 

He moved and crouched a bit to get a better look at Walker’s feet, they were even with Kanda’s chest. There was dried blood on them, but despite the open punctures, a bright, raw red, there was no blood flowing from them. The wound looked just like a stab through a foot with a sword should look, minus the blood. Moving his eye’s upward Kanda took stock of the cuts on Walker’s thighs – deep, open gouges, again lacking blood, allowing the samurai to see the pink, wet muscles and veins in the interior of Walker’s leg. He almost would have preferred blood, so that a scab could form and cover up the view, though it was doubtful a scab alone could cover the wound. Kanda wondered if a soul could bleed, not being made of flesh and all. He bit the inside of his cheek, but the burst of salty liquid he was expecting didn’t come. 

No bleeding, no scabbing. No wonder wounds took so long to heal. At least they didn’t seem to get infected here. 

“Okay, you guys ready?” Tyki called down. He didn’t wait for answers before continuing. “I’m going to pull both of these out at once. One, two, three.”

The rope held a little longer than expected and Kanda switched sides to catch Walker. He expected the other exorcist to weight more, he did eat a lot, but maybe souls didn’t weigh a lot to begin with. Careful of the wounds all over his bare chest, to both not touch them or look at them, Kanda shifted Walker so he was over his shoulder fireman style. Lavi had made fun of him earlier for showing up with Walker in his hands like a bride. 

“Now what?” he asked.

“Now we go back to Allen’s mind and I’ll try to close off the connection between Allen and Neah. I don’t know if I can, but I can at least reduce it and make it harder for Neah to enter.”

“And if you can’t close the connection completely, will this happen again?”

“Not if you’re a good friend.”

“Che.”

* * *

After he had returned to his bed and Rhode had disappeared, Kanda’s thoughts turned to Walker. It was annoying that Walker needed this much help, but then again he had suffered in silence and wasn’t asking for help (it was more like Rhode was forcing him to help). Walker didn’t complain, didn’t whine, and tried to do what he could to set things straight by himself. (Which was part of the problem, as isolation didn’t help any one, and Walker least of all.) All very commendable things in a person, and traits he would look for in a…in a…not friend. He and Walker weren’t anywhere near that level, but acquaintances seemed too loose. Comrades?

He liked the sound of that one. 

Taking a deep sigh, he slipped out of bed and made his way down towards the medical ward. Their first mission kept flitting through his head. Kanda had started off not willing to give the younger exorcist any help; the weak shouldn’t live anyway. But then Walker had gone and saved him, and Kanda was far from weak even then, simply because he felt like he should. And then had gone on to save the old man and the doll, even going so far as to stand up to Kanda to do so. 

Walker had changed since then, they both had, but Walker’s words “I want to be a destroyer who saves” never fully left his head. Kanda saw it as an impossible goal at the time, only to have that thought shattered less than an hour later. Since then he had debated about a similar path, but his convictions weren’t as bright and selfless as Walker’s. He was alive for one reason, and one reason only. To find her. 

But, as Kanda found himself settling into a chair next to Walker’s hospital bed, taking care not to disturb Link on a cot in the room’s corner, she hadn’t been at the forefront of his mind lately. He had been willing to die several times, on the Ark against Skin Bolic, in HQ against the level 4. And had he not tried to bring back Walker at that orphanage?

Who saves echoed through his mind again, the words in Walker’s voice. Walker wanted to save everyone, human and akuma alike, and certainly Kanda couldn’t allow someone younger than him to do something he couldn’t? And he definitely couldn’t allow a Noah to one-up him. It’s should be easy healing the soul of a friend, and Kanda was going to prove it. 

Walker’s soul hadn’t stirred the entire way back to his mind, and for all Kanda knew Rhode was still trying to close the connection Walker had to the 14th. Rhode didn’t know if Walker would remember being crucified, or if while he had been under Neah’s influence he had delved into the deeper layers of his mind to reveal harsh memories. Either way, Kanda figured it would be best if Walker didn’t wake up alone to a dark room. 

He moved onto the foot of Walker’s bed, sitting cross-legged so he could use his lap to polish Mugen. He had finished one side when Walker shifted and Kanda stopped what he was doing to watch the younger teen wake up. When Walker opened his eyes Kanda’s heart stopped, for the eyes were glazed and empty. Had the 14th taken him back? Was Walker’s soul beyond healing, slowing dying to bring the body down with it just after Kanda had made the promise to fix it?

His hand clenched on Mugen’s hilt, but it released as Walker’s eyes filled, his soul slowly coming to connect with his body again.

“Welcome back, Allen,” he said, staring into gray eyes while doing so. 

Walker blinked slowly, reminding Kanda of how he had looked when he had first woken up on the Ark. “Kanda?”

“Yes.”

“Did you just call me by first name?”

“Che.”

“And you’re polishing Mugen at the foot of my bed?”

“Yes.”

Kanda put down Walker’s easy acceptance of such things to his being disorientated.

“How do you feel?” Kanda asked, still staring directly at Walker. 

“Fine, I’ll be better in no time.” Walker tipped his head and smiled, eyes closed in typical Walker fashion.

“You’re lying. Go back to sleep. You need it, a proper one this time.” He pointed Mugen at Walker’s nose. 

And Walker didn’t protest, simply turned over and slipped a hand under his pillow before closing his sleep. “Aren’t you going to bed to Kanda?” he mumbled after a moment. 

“I will once I’m done,” he said quietly. 

Walker sighed and drifted off. Kanda put away his polishing cloth ten minutes later, but instead of going back to his bedroom returned to the chair and spent the night just watching his comrade breathe. 

Tyki had suggested that the simplest way to help a soul heal was to let its owner know there was always someone nearby who cared. That didn’t mean everyone else had to know though, so Kanda slipped out when Link started to stir.


End file.
